It feels different.
It's more quieter than usual.
Now, who will be my companion at night?
Now, who can I look at when I'm thinking for the answers?
When I do my homework, sometimes I'll do a solo act of something.
Then I'll look at the sofa to see Nyai looking back.
Now suddenly, that sofa at that corner of the house is empty.
When it was empty, the reason used to be because she slept over at my uncle's.
I know that within two days or so, she'll be back.
Now that it is empty, she won't be back anymore.
I remember when I was in kindergarten.
Parents send me and Kakak to her house.
Then while she sleeps, we'll play with the tape recorder.
Acting like deejays or something.
Nora and Nona.
Then usually, I'll open the fridge carefully.
So that she won't wake up to find me stealing bites from the cucumber.
And her words to trick us into eating.
"Last, last. Cepat, da last!"
"Nanti nasi nangis. Makan cepat, da last ni!"
Brother will be back next month.
I feel how sad he must be feeling.
Memories keep on coming back.
And that's all that is left of her.
Memories.
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